"For I consider that the suffering of this age is not worthy to be compared to the glory that shall be revealed to us."
Her father's words rang in her mind. She was falling, and couldn't open her eyes, though she could feel the cold, dark void pulling her farther down. Then she began to burn, streams of sand washing over her, eating away at her naked flesh. A fire that couldn't be quenched by the coolest water, the hot granules worked their way into her body, writhing inside of her like a worm. It tore out of every cavity- eyes, ears, and mouth. Not having the strength to scream, she could only feel the grit between her teeth, rubbing her mouth raw. The words of her father came loudly, but she wasn't going to listen. She gave in to the pain. It was of no use to struggle.
A soft, feminine voice came to her in the darkness among the sound of shifting sand, "Believe. Believe in your potential, girl." A flute started playing. It played low and steadily with the woman's voice. "You've done well, so far. You can do more. Reach out and lay hold on what's yours."
"I can't! I've failed!" she cried back.
"Of course you can. Every person is their own best friend. Their own advocate. Trust that."
"I don't know... what if I'm not enough?" Gelland said.
She felt the woman drawing closer to her somehow. "I could help with that." the woman said, like a mother to her frustrated child.
She wanted to reach out, but where were her hands? What was she? Gelland hesitated to accept. She then felt a different warmth, soothing her flesh and pulling her upwards again. The woman huffed out a breath, turning into a hum. "Until we meet again, girl." the speaker said, dissapointedly.
She came awake for a moment, only hearing footsteps on wood near her. After this, she went in and out of consciousness for a long while, and didn't feel the desire to awake. But she felt again. She felt pain every time she awoke. She would sleep to escape, but she dreamt of pain. She couldn't rest anymore, it felt too great. Her body radiated with it, and she found that she couldn't move immediately. But when she could, she didn't pay attention to her dark surroundings, she just rolled to her left side with effort. Right arm flopping to the bed she found herself on, she noticed for the first time that there was no feeling from the shoulder down. Grasping at her hairs with her left, she groaned with no relent, grinding her teeth. For some time, she lay on the cot, covering her face in her own spittle, shaking and dry gagging so heavily that it pulled at the wound underneath bandages. She hadn't done it. She'd fooled herself again, thinking that her best efforts would get her somewhere. She wondered if she would rather live in her current reality, or go back to the dream she'd just awoken from. Apparently her noise had woken someone upstairs, because creaking soon sounded near her. This someone had prolonged her miserable life, what was there to be grateful for? Instead of lighting the room, this person just sat silently, facing Gelland's back. "What do you want? Are you gonna keep me here? Might as well just end it." Gelland did not turn to this person. "You should ask why your friend chose to bring you here," an elderly woman's voice said. "No such thing." "And why your other friends checked on you, right after." Gelland sat, not wanting to consider this woman's claims. The woman hummed to herself for a moment, then said, "Your wounds were life threatening. If you had laid out in the street any longer, you'd be dead now. Don't worry, your bill has been payed for, as well. How are you feeling?" Gelland lay on her back again. She immediately adjusted her eyes to the woman and to her dark surroundings. Instead of seeing detailed features, the woman's face, with noticeable wrinkles, glowed softly to her eyes. Her face was orange, her clothes a dark blue. There were potions and flasks on shelves all the way around the room, which glowed blue, less than a warm body. Some hung over a counter, the contents being obscured by the height she was lying at. The frail, elderly woman sat with an unreadable expression, just eyeing her. She didn't seem all that threatening to her. "So you saved me. But why? Now my right arm is useless, and I'm even more of a shame to look at." she tried to swing a leg out of the cot. She gave a tsktsk sound, "I can't allow you to leave in your condition, if that's what you're trying to do." "You can't allow it, but you can't stop it," getting both legs overhanging the floor. "Answer me. Who made you heal me?" "You young kids are so obstinate. Nobody makes me do anything. I wanted to." With extreme difficulty, Gelland found her footing, stood and inspected herself. Her chain mail was still on over tight bandages covering her torso and arm. She reached out for her bag of chips, and the woman grabbed it for her. Before she could protest, the woman helped her place the belt that was attached to it through her belt loops. "Nothing is missing from the chips, your friend saw to that. That wound is still fresh. The outer skin is healed, but not the inside. I did what I could. Do you have a spare chip?" the shopkeeper said.
Gelland nodded. The woman made a sign with her left hand. A small black bag appeared in the hand, and she placed five small, black orbs on the counter. "Take these pain relievers with you. Be careful, they're still hot. I won't charge you for these."
Gelland sighed. The pills glowed with their heat. Placing her palm on top of the five, she, with some difficulty, finger spelled "Pill". The warmness of the orbs left her hand, the pills being stored in a chip in her chip bag. The woman showed that sign for her, again. Nothing showed up in her hand, as it was intended as hypothetical.
"A shameful thing that was that I was told happened to you." "Again, why should you care," Gelland said, "and why is this happening to me?" she said, speaking through gritted teeth. "Child, I'm a healer. If there's one thing I know, it's that the hurting people are my life. You give me purpose. What if you're here to hurt so that you create opportunity for someone to help?" Gelland couldn't believe this woman could say this. Her "tender" smile meant nothing. "So you're saying I should get myself hurt, so that other people can be entertained?" Gelland growled. "I will never accept that. I don't need anyone's help. I will rise above, even if I have to pull the sky down with my own hands!" Gelland moved to go out the back. She responded with just the shake of her head. "What's your name, lady?" she said, noticing a black and yellow design on the ring the woman had on her finger. It was like a man's hand, splayed out, but with claws. She thought the bauble a violent image for a healer. "There's much I wish I had the authority to tell you about... but when the work is satisfying, it's okay to remain nameless. Credit is nice, but nothing is better than having a clean conscience." the woman said gently. Gelland grunted, and refusing to look at her, walked out into the ring lit night.
The morning passed without ease back at her apartment. They had a house before he died. They had raided it after news had spread, and she'd fled. The basement collapsed, toppling the house on those inside. Kolen had warned her to never touch the book he kept in there. A deep man of manifold secrets.
Her mind swarmed with thoughts of her parents, about the day when her father came back with what he thought was wonderful news. He had his eyes downcast for so many years. She had known as soon as it had happened. The changes occurred immediately inside her. She had said was so proud of her father, but the disdain of her neighbors made this achievement bitter to her. She hid her thoughts, and didn't want to sadden him again. Not long after, her father turned up dead. The authorities said it was some terrible accident. What had he gotten himself into? And why was she now left with a burden she couldn't possibly handle? She'd fooled herself for too long, and keeping this suppressed was too much.
A quick rapping came at her door at evening. A person's shadow was visible underneath the door, and she hesitated for a moment. Deciding that there wasn't much else that could be done to her, she made her way to open it. A letter slid underneath, stopping at her feet. The person outside began to run. Opening the door, she caught a glimpse of the person heading around a corner away from her. The deep red of Cross' hair popped in the darkening outside hall. He must have been the one who picked me up after the fight. And his father was acting strange before, like Lixo wouldn't allow him to compete. She picked the letter up, read over it, and considered.
She met with Cross that night on the beach. It was Lixo that had killed her father. That had turned Cross into a cowering mess for so long. No longer.
The next night, Gelland sat cross legged in bushes at the base of a set of mountains to the north of Aubury. She'd walked an hour and a half to get to Cross' spot he'd indicated in another note. She'd been undisturbed by townspeople due to her black hooded cloak masking her body. The gate to the city closed not long after she'd left, having heard them in the distance. She prepared food and clothes beforehand. They would not let her back in before dawn.
The walk had been tough on her body. Her whole being ached. However, her head remained clear. Constant training had increased her aug enough for her not to suffer much dizziness, even for her loss of blood. That didn't keep her from feeling some nausea. She had also recovered more quickly than a person would with less aug, but she considered that wouldn't help her arm recover from its major nerve damage.
She made a sign, a pill plopping into her hand, and she placed it in her mouth. It was hard and hot, and she swished it from side to side. After a minute, the outer layer regressed to what it had been before being densed, and it was bitter. She swallowed the hot liquid inside. Her body moments later started to warm, the uncomfortable tingling in her right hand receded. It was just numb now, and her aching also was soothed a bit.
The letter had informed her of the opportunity at this spot, she need only be here when it arrived. Waiting is useless, only action matters, she told herself. Dad was wrong. You can hope all you want to, but no one will notice. Best to take what you want, when you want it. She thought of Lixo, the Vein having been within her reach. I should've finished him right then and there when I had the chance. She then waited for several more hours. Mist drifted though the mountain pass, barely lit by the ring, which was not overhead this night. This path through these two tall mountains rarely got travelers, since most of them thought they'd get attacked by bandits. The bushes were high enough on a ledge for her to look over the fork in the road. She thought to herself, Would people be afraid that I'd hurt them on this path? Don't start asking that now. No one is going to stand in the way of my revenge, she reassured herself. Is that old man I saw in the woods around here somewhere? What was he on about, and those animals around him? Surely Exagora's turning upside down.
Finally, a liram-drawn carriage took the mountainous path from the split within sight and came to a stop. The driver swiveled off the carriage clumsily and fumbled at the door which was thrown open from the inside. The two men scampered to the bottom of the left mountain, one a large figure, the other a thin man, hobbling on his right leg. Their glows disappeared into the mountain. Gelland raised eyebrows, and ran down the slope to the carriage, crawling in. No one else remained. Gelland heard panting and loud foot falls coming towards her, to which the liram gave a snort. They might've come back. She prepared a Wind sign to knock them down.
Voices followed the footsteps. "There! The black smoke billows from out of that carriage!" a male voice yelled. Peering out of the doorway she was met with shock. Yova, Teragram, Zeraphel, and Zolda came to a running stop, coming from Aubury in front of the carriage. She dismissed the wind from her hand with a flick of a sign. "Put down that hood, and show yourself." they demanded, sweat drenching their clothes. She put it down like they asked. They stepped back, frightened. "It's just me. What are you all doing here?"
"Gelland?" Zolda asked. "Were you the one who burned down that house? What happened to those two people in it? Tell us what happened."
"What? I've been here for hours, I wasn't..." she trailed off.
"Then tell us what you're doing here then."
"I can't. It's not your business. I didn't kill anyone, and I don't know what you're talking about."
"Gelland, we know you must be frustrated about yesterday." said Yova. "We can help, but you have tell us what's going on."
"About yesterday?" she scoffed, "Yesterday was just a small insight into my life! Someone gave me a letter saying that they know who killed my father, and to wait at this spot. For all I know that could be you, Teragram." She prodded at them, realizing that this was part of Cross' plan to help her against Lixo. The admission of how hard she had it gave her little relief. Shocked expressions covered their faces.
"Gelland we still can't remember who we are. If I was responsible..." Teragram bit his lip, and shook his head. "We tried to come back to see you this morning at the apothecary's place, and she said you had left without a word. What were you hoping to do in your condition?" Yova stepped closer, "We saw and cheered for you in that fight. And right now you shouldn't be alone. How were you planning to confront this person?" Gelland stared at this girl and the others. They had just met the day before, and had already latched onto her, if their story was to be believed. "I'm here to kill them. What else would I do? I have enough aug to take them down without having to use my hand." It was true, but she wasn't feeling very confident about her left hand's aim. Teragram looked up. "Alright. We'll stick around to look out for you, if you're so set on doing this." The rest of them surprisingly gave their assent. Gelland sighed, waving them along with her good hand while turning to face the mountain. The others followed without a word.
BETA READER: Opening chaos/uncertain scene aids emotional closeness to Gelland character; I like that. Dialog inside in large paragraphs visually daunting and unattractive. Break up paragraph; different speakers each get their own paragraph in dialog. Dialog within the same paragraph means the same character is still speaking. Pacing comes across as very slow in this chapter. Still not sure where the story is going as a reader, but I'm trusting the author still at this point that the story will unfold for me; not uncommon in fantasy, but don't withhold direction from the reader too long or the reader may give up and quit reading. I feel more sorry for Gelland with the death of her father; I want to know how her father impacted her character, emotions, development, personality, etc. Why should I relate to her father and his death other than the fact that he was a human being who has passed away? Big paragraphs are slowing down the pace and making the story line heavier and denser. The still new unfamiliarity with the story world creates an exceptional worry, anxiety and fearful atmosphere for the reader.